What happened ?

Legazpi, Albay Airport | MyAngel Photography

What happened? These two words bother my mind for weeks now. What happened to you dear self?

As I look back to those years I spent my graduate studies, I still couldn't believe I survived the hectic schedules and activities. Yes!  I've been really busy with lots of reflection papers, case studies, orals, exams, and research but I never did lose heart because I believed I will be able to pass the ordeal and will finally focus on what I really love doing which is Photography.

Photography was my motivation ever since I entered the walls of Graduate School. And though I had my class schedules I still managed to cut-classes for photography's sake. I had attended seminars and did grab photo session opportunities. There were also photo programs I failed to attend because of the demand of my studies. I declined offers too and promised to make it up after my graduation. I had so much energy, passion, and perseverance back then.

Fast forward to now, I already passed what has required of me. I already graduated together with my BFFs. Now I that I already achieved my Master's Degree, I'm over with those tiring yet exciting Saturdays. I never have to wake up early which turned out to be the very unproductive weekends of my life. I wanted to do something but lack the passion for doing so. I've got all the time, but I still failed. I really feel sorry for my old passionate self for not fulfilling the dream, for now.

So what actually happened?

Truth is I don't really know. It's like waking up from a wonderful dream. Then found myself longing for those moments,  feelings and goals. I am feeling lost now. I wonder where my heart and spirit is. I hope I can make it up to my old self someday. I hope that when that perfect time comes, I can finally say, "dreams do come true."  I hope that passion will find its way back someday, somehow. I hope it will be soon.


 As I am writing this, it is raining really hard outside. Thank you, God, for the comfort. I know it's You.